Thursday, August 11, 2011

Dear God, I need a big favor.

Could You like, a) keep my grandma safe in her procedure tomorrow and b) make her bloodwork clear up either tomorrow night so she can get her gall bladder taken out on Saturday, or clear up Sunday so she can get her gall bladder taken out on Monday?  Okay, I know that was two favors, but really.  If she ends up having this surgery on Sunday, I won't be able to move back to Campbell that day, because duh, my mom is gonna want to be here when her 73-year-old mother has surgery.  And if I don't move to Campbell that day it's going to complicate things in a thousand ways, and my mom and I cannot figure out how we'll make it work.  Please?  Thank you.  I mean, I know You're in control, and I'm trying really, really hard not to stress, but that's just not very easy for a girl like me.  Plus, I'd like to have one return to Campbell that wasn't complicated in some way, shape or form.  Love, ME

That's basically the deal with my grandma, y'all.  She's got a gall stone stuck in some duct in her pancreas, so they have to go in and vacuum (essentially) it out.  BUT they have to do it in a separate procedure because it can make the pancreas even more inflamed than it already is.  And there's some level they measure in bloodwork about her pancreas (I have no idea what it's called), so that's what I refer to when I say the bloodwork needs to clear up.

I don't like stress.  And I feel angry.  But it's not like I'm angry at any specific person because it's not like anyone could help this, it's just I'm angry that my life and my family's life is so complicated all the dang time.  And yes, I know that's stupid and pretty selfish, but it is what it is, and I have to let it all out somewhere.  So thanks for reading.

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