Tuesday, September 25, 2012


Today was a fairly average Tuesday.  Average is good sometimes.

Well, aside from the fact that I finally said goodbye to Brennan and deleted him from my life.  But I don't really feel like getting into that because it's just not worth it.  Know that I feel at peace with the decision and I know that now I'm finally to the point where God can start to heal all the pain this debacle caused.

But anyway, I'm sitting here thinking about what to say in tonight's blog post and all I can think is Girlfriends are so important in this life.

Like, seriously.  For the first time I'm realizing that as much as I love the guy friends that I have, and I know that they would do just about anything to help me, there are some things that they just shouldn't hear.  There are some they just can't understand because they're guys.  And tonight, really for the past few days, I am acutely aware of how amazing the women in my life are.  I am so blessed to have them in my life, loving me in a way I've never felt loved by my actual sisters.

There's one in particular that stands out to me right now, though.  Her name is Kyla.  I've never actually met her, but I feel like I have.  (I know, that sounds weird.)  She is part of the Sanctuary band and I remember hearing her sing that night in Nashville.  The music played a big part in that night, so once I knew that, I immediately felt appreciative of her.  We started talking a couple of days after I got out of the hospital in April, after I posted my blog about my baptism on Twitter once I got out of the hospital, Taylor retweeted it, and she saw it.  We never had a real, detailed conversation until about a month later, but since then, we've formed quite the sweet friendship.  And over the past couple of weeks, I've come to realize just how similar our hearts are, so I think that's why it's so easy for us to talk to each other.  To know that there's a girl out there who will listen to you talk and leave you feeling like she really gets where you're coming from is such a comforting feeling when you're stressed or hurting.  She and I have spent hours talking lately and by the end of every conversation, there's something we talked about that I think of that just makes me smile and laugh.

It just blows my mind sometimes, to be quite honest, that there are actually still people like that out there, specifically girls.  It's helping so much to tear down the last of the walls I'd been fighting to keep up around my heart.  Kyla, Michal, Ryann, Elizabeth, all of these girls have shown me a love that I'd gone without until I met them.  It's a completely different kind of love than what I feel from Matt, Taylor, Bruno, Paddy, all of the guys in my life, a love I didn't even know I was missing until now because I was so scared.  I am so blessed to have them in my life.  A few years ago, I had completely given up on anyone but Matt, guy or girl, ever loving me.

So, lesson of the day (week?) is, as it turns out, not all girls are mean. Haha! :) I hope these girls know that they teach me so much every day just being in my life.  They are irreplaceable gifts.  I pray that God never lets them forget that and that He fills me with the wisdom to show them the love they have shown me.

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1 comment:

  1. First - I totally love the new look of your blog! It's beautiful (which, I personally think, reflects your beauty, too!).

    Second - I'm so so SO glad that you have found the importance of girl friends. I, too, was someone who just related with guys much easier and it took me awhile to really identify the need for girls in my life. Now, I don't know that I could do life without them.

    You are amazing! You are loved! You are such a wonderful sisterfriend and I am so blessed to know you and be part of your life!

    Hugs, girl :)