We booked train tickets tonight. I'm going to take a train to New York while Mom and Holly go in the Uhaul, and then Mom will take a train back a few days later so that we only have to pay one set of gas and tolls. It just makes sense, and I don't mind it at all since I can get up and move on a train and it will be so much easier on my body.
My train leaves at 2:17 Saturday morning, and I'll be getting to New York City at 11:30. It's really real. I know I keep saying that but it just seems like some joke to me that I'm moving to New York, like this can't really be happening. But it is. I have the train tickets to prove it.
So this is my last week here. My last week in Swansboro (for the foreseeable future). I've been waiting for this. And yet...I'm scared. Scared I'm not cut out for this. But I know that I've been in this mental place before. I remember how bad college freaked me out...and that was Buies Creek. And this is why I know that Holly being there is going to be really good, because I will have my own life but won't be totally alone and will have someone there if I'm in trouble.
I just want to get all this moving stuff over with. It's exhausting and sort of makes me feel like we'll never get through everything that we have to get done, especially now with a solid deadline in place in which we have to leave.
It would help if I wasn't sick. Of course I would get sick in the last week before moving, because it's like Murphy's law of the universe or something. My sinuses are a disaster. But what Mom keeps telling me is just buck up! I've got to be tough for the life I'm taking on. And I've got it in me.
At least I think I do.