(Yes, that is a phrase from the song I posted at the end of the post yesterday.)
Today was hard.
Love is hard.
But being a Christian in a broken world is hard, too.
And you know what? God never promised that this would be easy. God never promised that we'd always be happy. All God promised is that if we lean on Him, He will be enough. Because He is enough. He is always enough.
I am always loved, because He always loves me.
And I must love these people because He loved me first. It's going to be ugly, and it's going to be hard, but I'm not willing to give up this time. This is too important. I have to be His light, there isn't any other option at this point. I have to choose to love these people even when I don't want to. And He can give me the strength, the wisdom, and the peace to do it.
Tonight, God, I give You thanks for friends who are not afraid to give me a reality check when I need it. Sometimes I get so caught up in my own emotions, I forget that just like I wrote yesterday, everything that happens in my life is for a purpose. It is for Your purpose. You have put me in this family so I can show them just how amazing and filling Your love is. Your love lasts when the rest of the world and all of the broken people in it, including me, fail. You, and only You, can save this family. Please, give me what I need to show them just how great You really are.
Help me to stop thinking about it so much and to just know that You are God and You are in control. You are always here, just waiting for me to suck up my stupid pride and let go of all the things I can't fix or control.
Well, I'm here. Please come. Save. Heal. Redeem.
And thank You, most of all, for never giving up.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8