Thursday, May 28, 2009

Pro vs. Con

Let's talk about nebulizer treatments, people.

The pro:
Well, DUH! Anybody who knows what a nebulizer is and what albuterol is knows what the obvious pro is. It opens up my lungs and keeps me breathing, as opposed to, you know, not breathing.

The con:
With every pair of mountains, there is a valley in between. The "valley" of albuterol? The fact that it makes me absolutely wired so I can't sleep, my heart races, and my hands shake. Seeing as how I'm taking said treatments every two to three hours around the clock, a good night's sleep is kind of out of the question. Which is pretty bad considering my mom wants me to go to school in the morning, I'm supposed to be up in six hours (5:30 am), and this wired feeling won't wear off for at least 60-90 minutes.

But seeing as how these treatments are one of the things that are keeping me out of the hospital at the moment, I'll just have to take the bad with the good. (I honestly don't see how I'm going to be able to go to school in the morning, anyway.)


My mom stayed home today because apparently she has a more mild version of what I have, and we ended up going to my family doctor nearby because my ENT (an hour and a half away) is out till Tuesday. She wrote me Prednisone, which is great because that steroid always helps me to breathe better. However, I will have to go see my ENT on Tuesday to see where she wants to go from here.

I just want to feel better. It's really hard not to feel like "Why do so many bad things happen to me?! All I want to do is make it to my high school graduation, God!" It's hard not to be angry. I mean, I know that there are families who have been through much worse with their kids than what I've been through, but that doesn't make this frustration go away. I know that sounds a bit selfish. Selfishness is just part of human nature, I guess. No matter how hard I try not to think selfishly, when I feel this horribly, it just happens.

Okay, that's enough rambling for tonight. I'm gonna go lay down and listen to TV and hope that I will fall asleep faster than normal.

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