Friday, June 19, 2009

Life isn't fair.

Like we haven't all heard that one before.

And everyone has points in their lives where they just scream, "WHY ME?" Bad things happen to good people all the time. As much as it sucks, you just have to try to believe that God doesn't give you anything you can't handle.

Case in point: Adrienne and Jim are a couple from TN. I follow Adrienne's blog constantly, after finding her through Angie. Adrienne and Jim suffered three miscarriages before bringing home a little boy, Owen, from Russia. Along with three more miscarriages, they had a domestic adoption that fell through last November. They traveled all the way to New Jersey to adopt a newborn baby girl, spending three days loving on her and taking care of her, only to have the mother change her mind and decide she wanted to parent the baby herself. Now, they have been waiting a few months to adopt a baby boy who was born right near them. Baby Braxton's mom is now having doubts about giving him up, despite her telling Adrienne they should trust that she was going to give them the baby.

It just seems so unbelievably unfair. Even though I don't know this couple, just by reading their blog I can tell that they are such a sweet couple with beautiful hearts who love children and want to not just be parents, but to give children homes. Something as hard as loving on a baby expecting to take him/her home only to "lose" then is hard enough to deal with once, but twice? It's just too unfair. I don't mean to sound like I take the idea of adoption lightly. I can't imagine how hard it was for either of these birth moms to decide at all to give their kids up for adoption. My heart just hurts for Adrienne and Jim.

We all have problems. Like I said, we all have moments where we think "Why me?" whether or not we're willing to own up to it. I know I've thought that several times throughout countless doctor appointments and tests and the surgeries. I guess that part of "growing up" is trying to learn how to just put everything in God's hands. It's not an easy lesson. Humans have an instinctual desire to try to control their lives. But we just can't. If I could figure out how to just trust 100% that God will take care of me, I know I'd be so much less stressed. But that would just make life too easy, wouldn't it?


  1. Hi Mallory, Yes this must be heartbreaking for them. What makes it doubly sad is that in my country there are literally thousand of babies who desperately need a home because of the abject poverty and high prevalence of HIV/AIDS (and I am not even talking about the babies who are infected with the HIV through their mothers).

    As far as "Life isn't fair", you should hop over to the Just Passing Through blog of Jozeygirl. She has a lot to say about that. Somehow I think you will enjoy her blog. She is also a Christian, but a very honest one who experience life in Technicolor and stero sound. Try her, you can find her through my blog.

  2. That is really hard! My brother & his wife went through the foster to adopt program in NC. They had two babies that they actually brought home through the foster care part & then the mothers took them back. So when another opportunity came up, the case workers kept the information from my brother & SIL until the "change your mind" period was up - they got my niece when she was 1 week old. Now she's a rambunctious 6 year old...

  3. Thanks for posting this! This is just what I needed to hear!