My mother is driving me insane tonight.
I missed an email over break that our graduation fair to order my cap & gown and announcements is tomorrow and Tuesday. I just found it tonight. Mom and I are both totally broke. Mom literally has like $20 to her name. So you know, since there are 3 weeks to payday, you would think that she'd want to keep that little bit of money to go toward gas.
She didn't want to ask Mommom, I didn't want to ask Uncle Ed.
Well, I was talking to a friend who also has anxiety issues about it and how this was stressing me out tonight, and without me ever asking for help or ever even thinking that she would offer to help me, she did. She told me to find out the prices and get her the details and she would help. (She doesn't even go to Campbell, she'll be sending me the money via PayPal.) I texted this to Mom so she didn't have to stress about selling something AND getting money in my bank tomorrow after work.
Well, of course, Mom and her stupid pride and her inability to accept help from anyone sent me back a text accusing me of ASKING this friend to help because I enjoy embarrassing her and saying that I'm now getting my cap & gown and announcements at the cost of her self-respect. Riiiiiight.
This is the text I sent her back: "I DIDN'T ASK. She offered without me saying a word!!! But sure think what you want. Guess what Mom, your pride is not more important than you getting as close as you can to the next paycheck. You admitted in your room last night that you've never been good at accepting help, and that's what gets you to make stupid choices. Accepting help from my friend who offered without me even asking does not make you weak or stupid or incapable. IT MAKES YOU A SINGLE MOTHER AND A TEACHER. And it makes ____ very very kind."
I'm not going to risk messing up ordering this stuff to protect her stupid pride. I'm going to accept my friend's help, and she's just going to have to get over it. And she will. I'm assuming she's just extra ornery tonight because she's in so much pain from her knee, but that doesn't make her actions any less stupid. Her obsession with prioritizing her pride over smart choices and practicality has done plenty of damage in the past; you'd think she'd learn by now, or at least ease up a little. But nope.
The irony of all of this? I wrote about the dangers of pride towards the end of my French paper last night.