You know how people say, like, "If I tell you don't think about a purple elephant, don't think about a purple elephant, don't think about a purple elephant, what are you going to be thinking about? A purple elephant."?
Yeah, well, I have a purple elephant in my head.
I was starting to do so well forgetting something/someone, not thinking about it, putting it behind me and starting to feel like my normal self again emotionally...and then I started having dreams.
Every time I slept. Dreams.
About the same person. And the same thing.
Which, as you might guess, kind of ruins the whole "forgetting about it" thing because all of these dreams get in my head, and then the more I tell myself to forget about it and shake it off and move on, the more it sticks.
I hate this. I hate that this person has so much control over my emotions, especially considering they almost certainly have no clue how much they're controlling.
I hate that things may never go back to the way they were.
I hate being reminded of just how much damage words can do.
I hate how everything blew up so quickly.
I hate realizing that there's a lot I don't know about someone I thought I knew very well.
And mostly, right now, I just really hate that I can't get this stupid purple elephant out of my head.