I got to talk to Taylor today for almost an hour, and it was lovely (as it always is). During the conversation, I was talking about my migraines and how I know that God can make something beautiful out of all of this. In response, Taylor mentioned Paul writing letters to churches from prison and how he found it to be a joy to suffer in the name of the Lord, and that it reminded him of me and my perspective. After the conversation, I texted him and asked him if he knew what the specific passages were, or at least what book they were in, so I could read them myself, and he wrote back with Philippians 1:21-30 and Colossians 1:24-29.
As soon as I opened my Bible to Philippians, I looked down and the verse above practically jumped off the page at me. My eyes were drawn to it, and all I could think after I read it was "YES. THAT." That was exactly the verse that could apply to my life right now.
Prayer. Prayer is a huge part of what is getting me through.. My prayers, but also the prayers of my dear friends who I know go to the Lord for me. I feel them every day, as I get out of bed, as I push through my day. They are such a gift.
The help of Jesus. That is the only reason I can do what I do. None of this is me or my doing. Not one second or microscopic little piece of it is because of me. If I were left on my own, I'd be a recluse.
And deliverance. I like that word. You don't see it too much nowadays, but it is such a great word. God is going to deliver me from the pain I live with. It reminds me of the Lord's Prayer, "deliver us from evil."
I think a big part of letting this be the year in which God sets me free is accepting that at this point, my health is out of my hands. It's a good thing that His ways are so much higher than mine. Like I said yesterday, God made the most beautiful thing out of Jesus's horrible and painful death, and Jesus was the perfect Son of God. So I know that He can and will make something beautiful out of this. He's redeemed so many of my other issues, so I know all too well that He is capable of far more than I could ever ask or imagine. So I'm giving this to him, completely, all the way.
We all have something we need Him to fix for us. The good news is that He will always deliver. I know He will because He is God and He is always faithful. It'll probably be frustrating because it's all on His time and not ours, but all that matters is that He is faithful and will come through when He knows it is the right time. We just have to let go and give it to him 100%.
Believing for healing...
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